Dear You...

I've always wanted to write one of those Dear You notes. Where you anonomously say all the things you've wanted to say to people in your life. So I'm finally doing one.

1. I miss our crazy childhood. You were my first best friend and I loved doing everything with you. Playing "teenagers," jewelry sales, documentary videos, radio talk shows, nick names, jelly shoes, crazy websites, and the list could go on and on. I miss the summer when we used to hang out everyday and living pretty much across the street from one another. But it's been years since we've been good friends, and I haven't even talked to you in months. You'll always be my friend though, and I hope someday we can talk more. My family and I miss having you around.

2. Sometimes you annoy me to no end. I just want you to do something with your life and it erks me when you don't. I try to be a better friend and have patience but sometimes you make it really hard. I've been trying though and even though you drive me crazy a lot I can't imagine not having you around. You are hilarious sometimes. You don't make the best decisions and I try to give you advice, so I hope one day you'll listen. Just be yourself and if someone does it like it then too bad for them. Don't change for people that aren't worth it.

3. I cannot imagine my life without you. You are my bestest friend. I don't know what I am going to do without you next year. We might not talk everyday but no matter how long we go without seeing or talking to each other we always pick up where we left off. It's funny because were opposite in so many ways, but alike too. We balance each other out. You are the funniest person I know and I can only have a fun time when I'm around you. I honestly feel that we will be life long friends. Our kids and grandkids will be best frandsss. You are such an awesome person I can't wait to see what God had planned for you! You will go places my dear.

4. I miss you. I still consider you one of my good friends, but I don't know if you feel the same way. I know since last year we've had different groups of friends, but I wish we got to hang out more. I love how even if we only talk once in awhile it's never akward. I could not have survived high school without you! You are one of the most down to earth original people I know and I love you for that. Please don't ever change.

5. Ending my friendships with you all was one of the best decisions I've ever made. We were never really friends to begin with. You tried to take control over a group of people, and I'm glad I finally saw the facade you put on. The first years of high school were hard thanks to you, but then I realized you were never really friends to begin with. I'm not mad anymore, and haven't been for years but I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for helping me realize I can stand up for myself, and that I don't need people in my life who push me around.

6. Sometimes I wonder if you care. I hope you do. Things have gotten better through the years but things still aren't the way I would like, or should be. Maybe once I'm away things will get better. Maybe...

7. I know you're out there somewhere and sometimes I get so impatient waiting for you. I cannot wait to meet you.

8. I cannot even express how much thanks I owe you. You have always been such a huge encourager to me. You would always send me the text randomly when I needed to hear. You were always there for adivce when I needed to talk. I cannot thank you enough! We haven't been close lately so I hope we can change that too because you have always helped me in so many ways.

9. I cannot imagine my life without you all. You are all like brothers and sisters to me. I love that you have never judged me and always liked me for who I was. I honestly feel like I will be friends with you for a long while, and I hope that's true. You are all such fantastic people, I cannot wait to see you all grow up. You guys will go places. :)

10. You are one of the only reasons I stay at work and haven't quit. Thank you for not driving me insane. Thank you for being one of the nice ones and making my day a little better.

11. We've gotten really close this year which is kind of ironic because we did after you left for school. I'm so glad we have though because you're like a sister to me! We have so much in common and I'm glad I have someone I can relate to. I'm so happy you have found a good group of friends that support you! I'm glad that you're putting yourself out there and having fun- you definitely deserve to! You are such a beautiful person inside and out I wish you would realize that more and not worry so much!

12. I think you are absolutely hilarious. I hope I get to know you better because you seem like a genuinely good person.

13. You are one of the most unique and original people I know. Please don't ever change. No matter what anyone thinks, you are awesome.

Music for the Soul...

The Genius application on itunes is probably one of the greatest inventions since the magic pancake flipper.

FOR REAL.

All of the good music I have found lately is thanks to this application. I find one good song and then I am introduced to even better songs and artists. It's really not a good addiction to have though because all my money is being used for music. But a good cause none the less.

Music used to never be an emotional thing for me. I loved listening to music, but it never really made me feel a certain way. I either liked the song or I didn't. Lately though, that hasn't been the case. I have found that just listening to a song can bring me to tears, not because I was necessarily sad about anything but because the song was so relatable and something that hit me so close to home. An example: Escape by Nathan Angelo. Look it up- nothing gets me as emotional as that song.

You know what I love most about music though? When you put your ipod on shuffle and hear every song you need to hear. When you get home from a bad day at school, work, etc and hear the songs that make you smile. Whenever I am feeling farthest from God and put my ipod on shuffle I hear all the right songs that bring my back into reality, and I have the duh Alise moments. I love the way God works in our lives. So so awesome.

Lately what I've really missed is being involved in orchestra. There is no bigger rush than playing a symphony like Dvorak, or 1812, or Carmina Burana. If you've never heard any of those songs look them up- and then imagine trying to play them. It's amazing to feel absolutely exhausted after playing a song because you just put all of yourself into something. AMAZING FEELING. If you can play it correctly of course.

I've been involved with theater my whole life and I never get nervous for auditions of performances really. But playing in an orchestra scares me every time. I have never been more nervous in my life having to play solos in orchestra. Even just in practice I would feel like I could not mess up at all. Which is probably what motivated me to practice so much, I had to be perfect. And I have to say there is no better feeling in the world than playing that solo perfectly at a concert and knowing that hours and hours of practicing had payed off, and you just made amazing music.

I really miss that rush, but maybe someday I'll pick up an instrument again. I bought a guitar a few months ago, hoping that I could teach myself to play. So far I know the first three chords to a Greenday song! One of these days I'll sit down and try to learn more, as for right now I'll stick with my guitar playing comedy routine- which my family loves. That is sarcasm.

I think it would be appropriate to end this blog post with some song recommendations since I just spent this post talking about music.

My friend Lauren introduced me to this song and it is probably the cutest song you will ever hear. Look up the lyrics, and then find me this man to marry. It's called "Campfire Song" by Chris August. Just a warning it starts like 20 seconds in.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xZqqCeWFZ4

Check out this guy's youtube song. He is an AMAZING singer and his songs are just plain awesome.

http://www.youtube.com/user/coffeysouthernman

Seize the moment..

I'll be honest, I haven't said this in at least the past ten years.
And it might be a little premature to say this because its only the second week.
But I figure I'll seize the moment and say it now in case this feeling goes away.

I AM ENJOYING SCHOOL.

It's Monday today and I did not wake up dreading the day. It was a really strange feeling.
Who would have thought that taking classes you actually like, and apply toward your major would actually allow you to look forward to school?
If only it had not taken me this long to feel this way.

This semester I'm taking a media communications class which I love! I think it's so fascinating and I really think it is going to help me determine which aspect of broadcast journalism I want to be involved with next year. I am taking newspaper too which I think will be challenging but fun. I'm finally getting a chance to do things that I will hopefully be doing for the majority of the rest of my life and I'm enjoying it. That's a good sign right?
I'm also taking a dance class which I am LOVING! It's a theater dance class and we get to learn to tap which I am ECSTATIC about! I have been wanting to tap for so long and now I get to order my tap shoes. Dorky I know but I'm finally getting to do things I really enjoy. It's a wonderful thing really.

Today as I was walking down the hallway I saw a sign for graduation deadline next week. This excites me so. In a short 16 weeks I will be done with ECC and on to greater things.
I have to say attending ECC was one of the best decisions I've made. It may not have been my first choice, but it was the wisest. I saved $60,000, strengthened friendships that I never would have had the chance to if I had gone away, and of course made some awesome friends through going to ECC. I also got the chance to do more stuff with CYT and try my hand at directing which I would trade with for the world. So all in all good choice.

But with all that said I cannot wait for next year. It has been my dream to attend Columbia for the past five years and now in nine months I'll be there!? It's almost incomprehensible for me. I'll be in the city doing what I love every day! That's unbelievable and amazing to think about. The only scary thing is I won't know anyone. But I'm so ready to start over, where no one knows me at all. I've always grown up with the same people my whole life, and now I get to do something completely out of my comfort zone. I think this will be wonderful for me. Now I just have to finish my app, send it in, & figure out how I'm going to pay for everything. Oh joyyyy.

Retail WILL be the death of me...

"Everyone should be required to work retail for atleast three months of their lives."

A very wise customer once told me this, and I couldn't have agreed more. This of course was after the person in front of her yelled at me over who knows what.
If there's anything I learned from working retail it is that the world is filled with ignorant and mean people. Big suprise right? Work today was just one of those days when I come home wishing I never had to return to work again. Sometime I wonder if it's worth the minimum wage...Ah well it could always be worse I suppose.

But from working retail for the past couple years I have come up with a list of the top 7 different customers that I deal with on a daily basis. It goes as follows.

-Speedy Gonzalez. This customer comes into the store with a plan. That plan is to get in and out as fast as possible. While waiting in line they go from register to register hoping to get to the cashier as fast as possible. When in actuality all this switching lanes is taking up more time than if they stayed in one spot. When they finally get to check out they complain about how slow the rest of the world is and when you cannot understand what they are saying because they talk to fast, or heaven knows you don't ring them out at the speed of sound they yell at how incompenetly slow you are and how you ruined their day. Touche my friend.

-The Slowsky. The total opposite of the speedster. The Slowsky spends HOURS and HOURS in the store slowly meandering through the aisles for fun. This customer especially likes to come in just seconds before closing and slowly wander through the store not exactly sure what they want. They don't seem to care that they are causing everyone to go home twenty minutes late. Usually after this customer decides they actually do not need anything anyways. Thats great because I love just standing around waiting for you to leave.

-The Blue Toother. This one is always hard to spot. You think a customer is sparking up a nice conversation, but after a dirty look and a point to the ear you realize that conversation was not meant for you. While in line they act annoyed when you ask them simple questions like if they needed anything else, or tell them what their total is. Sorry for doing my job, I did not mean to get in your way. A wonderful blue toother will stand in line extra long organizing their things while talking on the phone not paying attention to the other people waiting in line. This will cause even more pleasant customers.

-The Victim. The customer that thinks the world is out to get them. What I can't return my computer that I bought eight months ago because I decided last week that I did not like the color? I just haven't had time in the past year to bring it in because I fell and broke my foot, my dog died, my brother got sick, and I had malaria for three months, and I can't read so I had no way of knowing. Nope, sorry, I don't care what your silly excuses are, rules are rules. And guess what the world is not out to get you. You are just too lazy to get up and do things like the rest of the world does. You aren't special so don't expect any special treatment.

-The Ignorant DASHDJKSADHKA. My personal favorite type of customer. The one who does not care what he/she says they are getting what they want. And they don't care who or what they hurt on their way to get there. All the worst names and things said to me have been from complete strangers. From the Ignorant DASHDJKSADHKA. Luckily I am not scared when you threaten me, or call me any mixture of profanic names. It's more humourous than anything. I feel sad for you, sad that you think the only way you can talk to people is treat them like they are less than human. Well you are less than human.

- The Talker. Now this isn't necessarily a customer I dislike. After a day dealing with Ignorant DJASKLDAS and Victims, and Blue Toothers a Talker is not so bad. Maybe I do not care about how your identity was stolen, or that your husband is a total tool, or that your dream is to move to the Caribbean, but you sure make the day a whole lot more interesting. Sometimes sharing family gossip with a complete stranger is good for the soul, and I really don't mind listening. As long as this doesn't go on for twenty minutes, Mr. Anti Obama man.

- The Saint. Of course with all bad customers, there are not many, but there are a few wonderful people. These people give me hope that this world is not full of complete and total morans and ignorant fools. It's nice to have someone ask how you are, or after you say the have a nice day, they sincerely shoot one back. It's nice to hear the occasional thanks for helping me. I really sometimes do enjoy hearing about people's lives- the positive things please. It is always especially nice to have the Saint come after the Ignorant DHASLDJASH and assure you that you really aren't some imcompenet failure at life, but really it's the other way around.

Now of course not every person can fit into one of these categories, sometimes it's a mixture, and bits and pieces of a few. Some days are worse than others and some days I wonder why I even bother working at place where people are so under appreciated. While other days aren't so bad and the people I work with make up for the crazies that come in throughout the day.

All I'm trying to say is next time you go into a retail store just try and act humane to the person on the other side of the counter. Just because they are working retail doesn't mean they are a failure at life and it gives you no right to belittle them. Sometimes you need a job to get through college and pay some extra bills. Hey I don't want to be there anymore than you do, but someone's got to do the job. Just remember that person on the other side of the counter is someone's daughter, mother, son, father, cousin, grandparent, sibling, friend, neighbor, teacher, leader, mentor, etc. Treat them that way. It will make my time and yours so much more enjoyable.

In the begining...

I am horrible at first impressions.
I get so nervous about saying the right thing, and not looking like a complete nut.
This consumes my thoughts so much that I usually do exactly that.
Thank goodness I am lucky enough to sometimes get a second chance.

So I have decided to start a blog. I've always wanted to have one, because I figure people are dying to hear my innermost thoughts and all about my exciting life.
Or you know not.

I'm more doing this for myself. I figure it will be good for me to get my feelings out on....line i guess? I don't know if I'll really tell people about it, though if you're here and reading this you must find what I say semi interesting? Maybe?

But yea this is my blog.
I don't know how to really start this off. I don't want to be one of those bloggers that gives a history of my life because I know you don't really care.

So on that note here's my blog.
It's where I'm at.